Love Note

Got this letter today from one of my students from last year. It secretly arrived on my desk on a day when I really needed it. For those who may not be able to read first grade spelling, it reads, "Dear Ms. Bond. You're pretty like the stars. You clear my mind out. You put good things in and take bad things out of my mind. From Dainika

Pretty cool, huh? Young children are so poetic.

Important Warning

Last night during the (boring) Superbowl, there was a funny commercial with a guy who gets out of his car and attaches jumper cables to his engine, and then to his nipples. He supposedly is able to power up the car and its speakers with just his energy. But the part that makes the commercial so funny is that in small text at the bottom of the screen, it reads "Do not attempt." :)

Famousness

A brilliant doctor told my Mom yesterday that her case is so extraordinary that it could be publishable. Of course, she immediately went a few steps further, to consider the screenplay, and who would play her in the movie. The resulting conversation ensued:

Mom: I'm thinking Catherina Zeta-Jones will be playing me in the movie. And maybe Steve Martin could play you.

Dad: If Catherine Zeta-Jones is playing you, I will be playing myself.

What did you say?

Somer: My Nana died last week...

Me: Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!

Somer: It's OK, I just need to recharge it...

(Turns out she said Nano)




Here's another one:

Me (to my Bro); Will you and your big surfer friends be the bodyguards at my wedding?
Bro: Elbow, you'll have dozens of men there that would take a bullet for you.
Me: What about your son? Would he take a bullet? (He's four months old)

Bro: No, but he'd take a spitwad for you...

God

Setting: 21 kindergarten kids on a walk up the street to look at all the snow from a recent snowstorm...

Ricky: Did you know that God makes snow?
Me: No, I didn't.
Ricky: Me neither. My Dad told me. He makes other stuff, too.
Me: Really? Like what?
Ricky: Rain, water, rocks dirt, mud, houses... And he puts the paint on cars, too.
Me: Really? Does he make videogames?
Ricky: Yes. But only the good ones.

I love kindergarten.

Procrastinating

Instead of writing report cards, I am finding out which celebrities look like me...

"Here Comes the Bride?"

A four-year-old in my class sketched this picture of a wedding that she went to over the weekend. She entitled it "Here Comes the Bride." From the looks of things, I'm not sure this couple should be getting married. The groom seems pretty skeptical...