Tuesday, October 7, 2008

My What?

After watching tonight's debate, I wish I could eat a bit of chocolate every time McCain says "my friends." By now, I would be plump and happy on the couch.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008


After a challenging teaching year, I took this summer off to fix up my home and pack up lots of belongings in the hopes of beautifying our condo to the point where someone would want to purchase it. I have spent my "vacation" covered in spackle dust, ruining what's left of my fingernails painting and sanding the walls and ceiling of this 100-year-old dwelling that I've called home for the past 10 years. I was describing my endless labor to a friend the other day who shook her head and said, "that must be so hard." I thought about it for a moment...comparing it to the difficult time I had teaching last year. I realized that, when you want to pack a box or fix a crack, you gather the necessary equipment and you get the job done. All you need are the necessary tools and a plan. Unlike teaching, I explained to my friend, the crack does not try to stop being fixed, the box does not unpack itself once you've taped it up. With teaching, you can be totally prepared and have all the drive in the world but the fact is you are working with human beings with their own intentions and plans. One task is physically intense, the other is mentally and emotionally intense. At this point in my life, I'm getting enough emotional intensity from my family life, so there's only room for physical intensity. This summer I have been thoroughly enjoying the satisfaction of packing and repairing... accomplishing exactly what I set out to do. It's all so predictable, neat and tidy-- unlike teaching which is often so messy. I was explaining the packing/teaching analogy to another friend today, when she made a very good point: "Boxes don't call you on your birthday." That was just the kind of reminder I needed before I got back to school in a couple of weeks. At some point soon, I'm going to return to the classroom, embrace the challenges and remind myself of the immense emotional rewards that I can't get from boxes and cracks.

Monday, April 7, 2008

Love Note

Got this letter today from one of my students from last year. It secretly arrived on my desk on a day when I really needed it. For those who may not be able to read first grade spelling, it reads, "Dear Ms. Bond. You're pretty like the stars. You clear my mind out. You put good things in and take bad things out of my mind. From Dainika

Pretty cool, huh? Young children are so poetic.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Important Warning

Last night during the (boring) Superbowl, there was a funny commercial with a guy who gets out of his car and attaches jumper cables to his engine, and then to his nipples. He supposedly is able to power up the car and its speakers with just his energy. But the part that makes the commercial so funny is that in small text at the bottom of the screen, it reads "Do not attempt." :)

Saturday, January 26, 2008


A brilliant doctor told my Mom yesterday that her case is so extraordinary that it could be publishable. Of course, she immediately went a few steps further, to consider the screenplay, and who would play her in the movie. The resulting conversation ensued:

Mom: I'm thinking Catherina Zeta-Jones will be playing me in the movie. And maybe Steve Martin could play you.

Dad: If Catherine Zeta-Jones is playing you, I will be playing myself.

Monday, January 21, 2008

What did you say?

Somer: My Nana died last week...

Me: Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!

Somer: It's OK, I just need to recharge it...

(Turns out she said Nano)

Here's another one:

Me (to my Bro); Will you and your big surfer friends be the bodyguards at my wedding?
Bro: Elbow, you'll have dozens of men there that would take a bullet for you.
Me: What about your son? Would he take a bullet? (He's four months old)

Bro: No, but he'd take a spitwad for you...

Thursday, January 17, 2008


Setting: 21 kindergarten kids on a walk up the street to look at all the snow from a recent snowstorm...

Ricky: Did you know that God makes snow?
Me: No, I didn't.
Ricky: Me neither. My Dad told me. He makes other stuff, too.
Me: Really? Like what?
Ricky: Rain, water, rocks dirt, mud, houses... And he puts the paint on cars, too.
Me: Really? Does he make videogames?
Ricky: Yes. But only the good ones.

I love kindergarten.